A field guide to awkward silences

1. How Not to Be Awkward

2. Flopper

3. Five Uneasy Pieces

4. Ten General Rules

5. How to Talk to People

6. Tuesdays with Hitler

7. Go Whistle for It

8. How to Join a Cult, by Mistake, on a Tuesday, in Fifty-Seven Easy Steps

9. Teen Jesus

10. Your Prize Came

11. The Naked Pun

12. Unreconstructed

13. Trivial Pursuit

14. Grab Life by the Debutante Balls

15. Time Traveler's Yelp

16. We Are Not a Muse

17. Tall Tales

18. It's a Trap!

19. Dietary Restrictions

20. Under the Dome

21. Self-Defense Tips fo Fairy-Tale Girls

22. Internet Bitch

23. The Dog in the Manger

24. So Far, So Good

Acknowledgments.